anotherodetothebottle

remember when
my fingers would spill out my nights
and tell the world about my every mistake
I'd never learn to regret
(it's the happiness that counts, not the aftershock)
I feel as though those days have come full circle
and these days are filled with so many words
that I hope that I can only find the time to write a few of them down

I find that now
and I want to relive every midnight
in technicolor
because I never thought my nights would play out like this
I never thought I'd find my eyes opening
to the sights that I've seen
I never thought I'd be so lucky
it's been so long since my last round
that saturday nights are looking more promising

would you believe me if I said
this was all your fault?
because I'd love to have someone to blame
for my lack of self concern
(I've strangled my emotions and threatened them upon return)
I'm keeping my secrets
far from the truth I once claimed to be
you don't live here anymore

when I find myself
once again entangled in someone else's sheets
I'll think of the nights you told me it was true
and laugh even louder at the lies that escaped your lips
my eyes don't want to find his
but they will for the sake of the moment
and I'll wake up in a dizzy of
whereamI?
but you'll feel the sting of
she'sfinallymovingon
and I'll know my work here is done

nobody saw this coming
and I'm sorry for being a disappointment
and not living up to your image
of the girl you knew in high school
I'll find my way through saturday nights unscathed
no need to worry
I'm more of a professional than you'll ever know